Fauxcon
I’m so stubborn with these.
Like this comic.. over three days of work on it. It’s that thing where you have the idea in your head and it JUST HAS TO look like you need it to. But this is another Danny montage. Seems to be his tendency. That… and telling on himself. :P
OCTOBER PATREON WINNERS:
Anton: Acton, MA Set 3
Owen: East Stroudsburg, PA
Gary: Round Rock, TX Set 1
Chris: Aurora, IL
I’ll be mailing these sketches out on Monday, options are under this comic: http://shotgunshuffle.com/comic/making-friends
I’m only going to do one drawing for November, but it will be for more than three sketches. I’ll post those next week.
Also, I’ll be getting together an email to the four of you in the $50-$100 donation range so we can figure out your cast page ker-jigger. :)
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Clearly the economy has hit Rifle Guy hard. He’s now down to BULLETS.
Oh, and it’s all the little details. The surviving ratchtantula at the mall, the local branch of Urine Fer Sale….
is that JUNIPER at an AA meeting? Oh wow. Black Friday did a number on her after all.
Replied to: Steve | Link | Like
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So many little details that I would completely miss if the comments didn’t point them out to me. I must be the most oblivious person on the face of the earth.
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I missed everyone of those too.
Replied to: Steve | Link | Like
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Hour damn Steve. Your eyeballs are really on the job today.
Replied to: Steve | Link | Like
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Thanks for pointing them out! It looks like I’m not the only dork who misses awesome details like that. . . I wonder if Juniper attends AA because she realizes she has a problem, or it the court ordered her to.
Replied to: Jamilee | Link | Like
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There are just so many of these little details. It’s at least 38 percent of why I love this comic so. Every new strip is a credit to Rusche.
Replied to: Jamilee | Link | Like
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I’d posit she’s looking for love… or at least some new drinking buddies.
Replied to: Steve | Link | Like
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AA? I thought it was Alcoholics Enthusiasts! Was I lied to again?
#FML
Replied to: That One | Link | Like
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You’re TRYING to improve your life! Stop making us lose faith in you!
Replied to: That One | Link | Like
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Please see the next installment for my comment to that one.
Replied to: Steve | Link | Like
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More like Bullet I Own; shade of Barney Fife…
Replied to: Richie | Link | Like
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Shades…
Replied to: Richie | Link | Like
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Barney has more than one bullet in his pocket now? We had better go high security and put the keys in the desk. If he ever meets the true Alcohol Enthusiast girl here, we’re doomed.
Replied to: Sheriff Andy Taylor | Link | Like
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Jeepers, Ange, she looks like a wild one. If Thelma Lou ever found out I was sniffin’ around after that I’d be shootin’ blanks for the rest of m’life, if you take my meanin’.
Replied to: Steve | Link | Like
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Hehe, called it! :)
Well not the bullets, but his presence.
But good eye you have there. I didn’t spot most of these until the second attempt after reading your comment. Okay, my cold didn’t help. But still…
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So he’s basically paying her to go out with him on terrible dates?
Replied to: Jb | Link | Like
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It’s like Pretty Woman: The Sad Version.
Replied to: Steve | Link | Like
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The creepy factor on this guy just goes through the roof….
Replied to: Jb | Link | Like
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More like the dumb@ss factor by now, really.
Replied to: Jb | Link | Like
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Yes
Replied to: Rusche | Link | Like
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Is it the same $300 a clip? Because man, he’s either done pretty well or he’s going to have some really angry Canadians coming down here pretty soon, eh?
Replied to: Steve | Link | Like
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Given the way he invests (ie paying her to go on terrible dates, instead of asking her on a date and investing that money to make them good) I’m guessing Canadians.
Replied to: Jb | Link | Like
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This panel alone should bring him somewhere up around $2400 total, counting Onomatopeiacon.
Replied to: Steve | Link | Like
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Not to mention the cost of the montage that he obviously got more of.
Replied to: Steve | Link | Like
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I’d love to see him picked up by a Canadian version of Jules and Vincent from Pulp Fiction, who I picture as being ultra-polite. Forgive me, but I’ve never heard of any country named “What.” Do they speak the Queen’s English in What?
Replied to: Gravatarless | Link | Like
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Now, I must apologize for being abrupt, but I’m getting rather exasperated, eh? Therefore I’m simply going to have to double dare you to say what again, good sir.
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“Why am I surprised I’m in a prison right now talking to an inmate I shouldn’t be this surprised the amount of security we had to pass by and the giant sign saying this is a prison should’ve tipped me off why am I here oh god he’s mentally undressing me and stabbing my neck with his mind I want out please let me out”
Replied to: Anonymousanonymous | Link | Like
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I think it’s actually a response to the arm on her shoulder; rather than the convict.
Replied to: Jb | Link | Like
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I don’t see why it can’t be both.
Replied to: Steve | Link | Like
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But which one would be worse? Or is it the combination of the two of them that makes it worse?
Replied to: Mr. Blue | Link | Like
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Ellie’s Face: HALP!
Replied to: Jb | Link | Like
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Might just as well be a reaction to the topic discussed.
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Since it doesn’t seem like we’re going to get to see the Hobo Chili cookoff, I’ve decided to post my own favorite Chili recipe.
Ingredients
3 tablespoons Olive Oil
3 cups finely diced onion
5 garlic cloves, mined
2+ pounds of ground beef
2 tbsp chili powder
1 tbsp ground cumin
1 tbsp dried oregano
2 tsp unsweetened cocoa powder
2 tsp salt
2 tsp celery seed
1 tsp turmeric
1 tsp cinnamon
1/2 tsp dried crushed red pepper
2 cups tomatoe juice
2 cups beef broth
1/4 cup of cornmeal
Heat oil in a large dutch oven over medium heat. Add the onion and the garlic and cook until translucent, stirring occasionally- about 10 minutes. Add beef and cook until brown, crumbling with a fork- about 8 minutes. Mix in the Chili powder and the next 8 ingredients (all the spices and seasonings), and stir for 3 minutes. Add the tomato juice and broth and bring to a boil, stirring occasionally. Reduce heat and summer until the liquid is reduced by about 1/3- about 90 minutes. Add cornmeal and stir for 2 minutes.
Serve over rice or with cheese.
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Yum, Anon. Just, yum.
Replied to: Steve | Link | Like
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It sounds interesting, and there isn’t any brown sugar or molasses. I’d like to try that.
Replied to: Mr. Blue | Link | Like
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I didn’t mean to post that anonymously- I had just reformatted my hard-drive and all my old cookies got wiped. So I was used to having it autofill in my name and e-mail, but it didn’t.
On another note- did you realize you could post anonymously? Where is says “Name (Required)” it apparently isn’t.
Replied to: Deepbluediver | Link | Like
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Better yet, you can change it at any time, for any reason, including “capricious whimsy,” “to make a joke” or “none at all!”.
Replied to: Deepbluediver | Link | Like
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I think anonymous gravatar fits though. Makes you look depressed that we couldn’t see the Hobo cookoff.
On the note of chili I need to remember to go up and copy the recipe because it looks good.
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Try using some finely ground Mexican chocolate for the cocoa powder some time. The spices in it work nicely with chili.
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Sounds delicious, but the lack of pigeon and rats makes me question the authenticity. :(
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P.S. I can also provide links to a vegetarian version if anyone wants.
When I was younger, I didn’t like beans at all, so I wouldn’t eat my parent’s chili. Then at a tailgate party someone brought this, which didn’t have any beans, so I got the recipe and started cooking it for myself. Eventually I grew up and my tastes matured, and I started putting beans back into this chili. When I lived with vegetarian roommates, I figured out a way to reverse-engineer everything to make it meatless instead. And thus the culinary circle of life was complete.
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And man, that first panel. Ellie needs to check out some Lara Croft cosplay because she’s almost there.
Replied to: Steve | Link | Like
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What do you mean almost?
Laura wishes she had that figure.
All Ellie needs to do is borrow a long-brown wig from Pumpkin & a empty gun or 2 from her dad, and she’d be set.
Replied to: ArendJK | Link | Like
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I’m all for improvising costumes and support gun ownership, but costume firearms are best the plastic kinds with orange tips to make it obvious to anyone (especially police if a panicy dipshit calls 911) that they’re not actually viable firearms.
Replied to: That one guy | Link | Like
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I remember the old school cap guns. They were made of black-painted metal and had a dark plastic crosshair inside the barrel you could only clearly see when it was pointed at you, and the hammer actually moved when you pulled the trigger.
Replied to: Gravatarless | Link | Like
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Yeah, my one cousin had some that were actually past that and looked authentic. He also had a cowboy phase around then and walked around in older elementary school/younger middle school with two realistic-looking revolvers. Luckily we lived in a sufficiently small/rural area that everyone knew everyone else so there were no mistakes.
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Hahahahahah oh my gosh the power walker ladies!!!
Danny really is milking this isn’t he. Hmmmmm
Replied to: Banena | Link | Like
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It seems like he also knows how to get Ellie to dress up for each demographic.
Replied to: Mr. Blue | Link | Like
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Not really,
IF that had been the case, she wouldn’t be showing so much cleavage to the powerwalkers, or so much anything to the Amish
The rest are plausible though.
Replied to: Mr. Blue | Link | Like
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That is a LOT of banned slutwear.
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I think the Amish are my favorite for Danny advertising his website to.
Replied to: That one guy | Link | Like
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I especially like the Amish driver’s exception powers of eye control. It makes me think of Kingpin: “It’s like I told you before, we Amish, we do everything half again as hard as you do.”
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Let’s hope Anise never discovers the bears of the Amish
Replied to: Lane | Link | Like
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Or even their beards:p
Replied to: Lane | Link | Like
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No… your original statement was much better.
Replied to: Rusche | Link | Like
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“It’s like ZZ Top showed up for a Beardy centerfold! ALL THE TIME! I’m NEVER leaving Lancaster again! Wait…what do you mean they don’t get tattoos? Well what am I supposed to do for WORK?”
Replied to: Steve | Link | Like
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Crap, I shouldn’t have mentioned these were fake either…
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Hm, some thoughts…
* WHERE ARE MY HOBO CHILIS?!? I WAS PROMISED HOBO CHILIS! I BELIEVED YOU!!one!1!
* Fantastic montage!
* I hate bad puns but love subtle puns; I’m giving you an extra gold star for the double secret pun you named this comic with.
* I died laughing at “Bullets I Own.”
Replied to: Gravatarless | Link | Like
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I would be interested as to how people would react to bullets I own display.
Replied to: That one guy | Link | Like
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By now you have your answer, heh.
It’s a shame Ellie’s too straight-edge for montage. (For some bizarre reason the first song that came to mind when I typed that was Toni Basil’s “Mickey”… maybe for the comedic contrast value from what’s happening.)
Replied to: Gravatarless | Link | Like
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I meant at an actual gun show. I wonder how many would glance and then ignore, how many would look confused for a minute, how many would stop and talk to him and try to figure out what the hell he’s doing, and how many would look around to try to spot the hidden cameras assuming it was some kind of Candid Camera descendant.
Replied to: That one guy | Link | Like
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HA! That’s great! I kinda wanna see that now too. Sadly, the main thing in my head is Hey Mickey. I can’t stop hearing it every time I look at the montage.
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Oh, Danny…
Is there any level of fail to which you do not aspire?
Replied to: Thor | Link | Like
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I think you’re looking at it backwards. I think it’s more of a, “I’ve failed FAR more than this in the past. Pathetic? Oh, if you think THIS is pathetic you haven’t seen anything yet.” A person can get acclimated to anything, and once it doesn’t register…
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Is the reason why there is only one bullet on the table of the vendor because your current versions of a any small firearm looks horrible to you?
Replied to: Some Unregistered Punk | Link | Like
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See the 30 May 2014 comic (Product Placement). He went to the comic con with the table labelled “Rifles I own” (plural) and had only one rifle on display as part of a display of people that have obscure motives for wanting to show off random things people probably don’t care much about.
So I suspect the single bullet was to get the same joke of him talking plural and showing singular, and also making clear that he’s just as ridiculous here (at a gun show a table with one rifle might be a sign of someone who did well and didn’t bring enough to sell and is down to his last inventory item).
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LOVE “Alcohol enthusiasts”; talk about putting a positive spin on things!
Also love Ellie’s pose in that last panel…
Replied to: Richie | Link | Like
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The thing that catches my eye most in the last panel, once I read the comment above pointing out the urine salesman, is that his posture and positioning with that container seem very suggestive that he was drinking out of it, and while it might be a different liquid, it is the right color for his previous wares.
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Urine for sale guy looks WAY too happy to see Ellie. And I like the question marks over Junipers head, like she can’t quite figure out why Ellie would be there.
It sounds like Ellie is starting to figure out what Danny is up to, I bet this fail train is about to run out tracks.
Replied to: TheLastOutlaw | Link | Like
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Good eye on the question marks.
Replied to: TheLastOutlaw | Link | Like
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In fairness, Ellie is Urine-For-Sale’s only confirmed customer.
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Isn’t that the same boat from Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade?
From the Venice Boat Chase?
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Did not know Florida had such a large Amish community or Danny is really booking the miles on that rolling rust bucket.
Replied to: Iron Billie | Link | Like
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Plane tickets can’t be much more expensive than what Danny paid for from the minibar back in the hotel…
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I like that we get to see more of Ellie’s wardrobe, but… Man, I really miss the days of the blue shirt. It looked good without being sexualized, which actually made it more attractive. It reflected her youth and in a way some degree of innocence, which I think really worked for her character. I feel like Ellie’s wardrobe is growing up, but not in a way that I’m a fan of…
Replied to: Icosiel | Link | Like
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Well, you have to bear in mind that she’ s not changing so much as she’s changing for the job. These are ostensibly convention runs, so she’s getting paid for these…at least theoretically.
Replied to: Steve | Link | Like
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That’s a good point, I’d forgotten that Danny was paying her to dress like that. Which is… Hmmmm. Questionable, at best…
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penis reference