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Easy to Please

Who didn't love their first hotel stay without parents? ****************************** Wednesday's post will be up in the afternoon. This is another instance where it reads better being a bit longer, so I'm putting a bit more work into it. :)

94 thoughts on “Easy to Please

  1. I’m just gonna go ahead and note a lot of love for the, uh, view, in the first panel. Yeah.

    As for the hotel, I can’t imagine this going well if dude really doesn’t manage to get Ellie a paycheck. She broke out THE SLUTWEAR.

        1. Damn Mexicans. Always comin into mah countreh speakin’ their foreign-ese at meh. Stealin’ jobs away from respectable American citizens like this here Ellie girl. Despicable.

  2. Oh Danny. Danny, you have no idea what you’re in for.

    But we kind of do!

    2:1 *unattracted!* punch directly to the jawline. Danny suffers crippling injury to his pride.

    4:1 *unattracted!* punch directly to the jawline. Danny makes contact with the floor.

    10:1 *unattracted!* punch directly to the jawline. Resulting impact sends Danny out a window.

    25:1 Ellie finally gets that chance to kick into the crotch she’s been missing since Quinn beat her to it.

    50:1 Danny? Who’s Danny? Oh, that guy who showed up at Onomateopeiacon with the stupid website. No, I haven’t seen him for months. Why? What do you MEAN “you found his hat in the middle of what looks like an ice cream truck explosion.”?

    100:1 An ice cream truck is found in the Everglades, its occupant half eaten by alligators. Wedged in its mouth is a stack of fliers for a social media website. One has chewed gum stuck to its corner as if it had been pulled from a trash can.

    500:1 This plan actually works. Ellie suffers the extended horror of “ending up just like Juniper.”

      1. I dunno, I think I’m gonna have to put my bet down alongside Thixophobia. I’m gonna bet 8 million moneys that Ellie is at least “technically” a virgin.

        1. You can put it down all you want but absolutely no one will lay odds on it. We’re all pretty well aware of Ellie’s untouched state; pretty much said so several times in the archives.

        2. Buckingham Virtue Odds:
          Ginger: 1:1 – Honest Woman
          Tarragon:
          – 1:1 — honest relationship
          – 4:4 — played the field
          Anise:
          – 2:3 — honest relationship
          – 8:9 — played the field
          Juniper:
          – 1:1 — what?
          Lavender:
          – 20:1 — Hat
          Cinnamon:
          – 5:2 — Applesauce
          Pumpkin:
          – 0:0 — The fat lady ain’t even fat for the opera yet.

        3. …wait, what? Applesauce? Hat? What is this, a bookmaking operation or a pai gow table? I don’t understand a word of it!

        4. Where? I never noticed that, it was always just flirted with out of sight of the cameras.

        5. There are actually several that combine to have that effect. Start here

          http://shotgunshuffle.com/comic/cinnamon/#.U-ItB6MveSo

          Follow it up with the next one in the chain

          http://shotgunshuffle.com/comic/small-town-saturday-night/

          Then finish it off with

          http://shotgunshuffle.com/comic/reasons/

          The three add up to Ellie doesn’t get out much, though she’d like to, and is probably not having sex as a result. Granted, it’s not like she’s pinned her V-card on her sleeve, but two and two and two would certainly seem to make six here.

      1. Well, if you’d been around for Ellie and Cinnamon’s birthday–which was itself quite an affair–you’d know that apparently you live in a ditch. That’s not commonly a desired end.

        1. Don’t knock the ditch. It has AC and cable these days. Also, tornado resistant.

  3. Wow Danny your soooooo romantic and s#it. Methinks those flowers won’t be the only things being fresh in the room, hawhaw!

  4. Wait, I get the place to myself tonight? Dammit, I could have had plans! Maybe! If I had enough forewarning!

    Oh screw it, what’s on television?

    1. Or, you’re going to be scrubbing the sofa from the summoning stains left by the spell that Pumpkin used to call forth Mr. Fatty McFatFat. All of the charred bits of Hellfire and Brimstone and what not, eh?

  5. Dat….comic. Yea.. Anyways I hope Ellie came prepared for a stay at a hotel (toothbrush/toothpaste, extra changes of clothes etc). I also hope she brought a taser. Danny’s intentions are making me extremely uneasy. Moreso than before when he was all “be as naked as possible” lol

  6. Irregardless of Danny’s intentions tonight. In what shape would Ellie leave the room on check out for the maid? I believe the movie is “Blue Crush.”

  7. Ok, so Danny is PROBABLY lying, just so Ellie sticks around. But what do you think the odds are of this whole con-thing working out in the long run?

    I kinda have a soft spot for character’s whose lives seem to be one continual train-wreck after another (even if it’s somewhat self-induced) and want things to work out for them in the end.

  8. Well, given that my first hotel trip without my parents I had to sleep on the couch (which did not fold out) with another girl while two other girls hogged the bed, not ok.

    1. Second time wasn’t that bad. Bumped into Taylor Swift in the fitness room. Her bodyguards wouldn’t let me get her autograph though.

      1. You…you survived an encounter with Taylor Swift?

        So when does the song “That Creepy Janobii In The Fitness Room” come out?

  9. I love Ellie’s star-face. That’s the only thing I can think of to describe it. All things considered she seems really low maintenance…

  10. …how…how did Ellie and Danny get to the hotel? Were they within walking distance? I note this because I find it tough to believe that Ellie would actually ride in Danny’s rolling homage to the Twisted Metal series.

      1. A hotel within walking distance that has rooms available during a major convention!!!! Not likely.

        Bet they had to take Danny’s truck (for lack of a better description) somewhere off the beaten path.

        “Beaten Path” as in that’s what Danny’s going to be beaten into!! I love puns :)

    1. How did he get her to the hotel? Danny has a van so non-mainstream it references a comic ice cream parlor that never existed. I’m gonna guess he drove her there in it.

      1. I’m sorry, but about the only thing separating that ice cream truck from being a crime scene are the words “Free Candy” on the side written in dried blood.

        1. Oh, no argument there. I’m just saying that particular crime scene still runs at the moment.

  11. Oh god Danny Phantom please don’t assault her, you’re a hero, don’t embrace your alternate-future self who goes around being a jerk for fun.

  12. Hmm, did something change about your color palette? I just came from a couple months back in the archives, and this strip is decidedly more colorful… maybe its just my eyes…

  13. Man, I don’t know what’s going to happen here. It could be he wants the connected rooms (sans door) so it’ll seem more suite-esque, or he could be planning creepy creepiness. I guess I’ll have to wait until Wednesday to see.

  14. On a completely different note. Maybe Ellie should hook Danny up with Anise! They have the same hair style after all. Picture them and their children in a family picture all lined up and each one with their hair draped over the right eye.

  15. OK. As a guy who has worked in three different hotels, either those flowers are fake or there is no way a guy like Danny could afford a night there. Granted, I live in the Midwest but fresh, daily, assorted flowers cost a ton and need to be replaced daily (the hotels would buy flowers for some holidays and they cost between $1300-$3000). 10:1 that card gets declined.

        1. You can’t just bet pie. You have to bet pie on something. And generally it’s a good idea to elaborate on the type of pie so as to fully get a handle on its value.

        2. I bet a homemade from scratch chess pie that Danny could afford the nightmares and get that room without teh borken fjord as well.

        3. IT’S GOOD

          John Madden screams at Pat Summerall as the Replacements in “The Replacements” were accidentally vorped in time, slace and fictional universes into the football game where Reggie rushed the President out of the football stadium in “The Sum of All Fears.” But Ben Affleck doesn’t save the nation and Keanu Reeves because he’s all sad Batman.

        4. So then who wins the war? The Russians or the Neo Nazi’s or is it Spain because no will ever see that coming?!

        5. Those damn Alaskan-Nunivut federation won. Sarah Palin’s daughter absorbed enough radiation therapy to surpass her mother politically, invaded the Yukon territories, Nunavut, Newfoundland, as well as federalizing half of Greenland. They turned the northern most parts of the southern most parts of the provinces into provisional territories due to the spread of the radiation zones above the U.S.-Canadian border which led to not only widespread riots but also widespread glow in the dark zombies with bright day glow yellow eyes.

    1. Yeah, right. Like you worked for the big name hotels. 1, this is Florida. 2, this is in Orlando. You know OR LAN DO. Not Tony, not Calrissian, home of the mouse ears. That Orlando. And given the location, perhaps there are plenty of green houses abound down there. Maybe, just maybe, one of those big name hotels, related to Paris, owns a few greenhouses and such and not only sells to other florists and hotel chains at a profit, but also provides fresh flowers to the big name in question at cost.

    2. Uh, yeah. You see, what you have here is your basic know-it-all who thinks just because he’s got the, uh, uniform right, that, ahhh, they’ve got a basic right to butts in onto the conversation. Isn’t that right there Norm?

  16. Funny how at a comic/gaming/cosplay/whatever convention she looks like a booth babe, but the same outfit in a hotel lobby makes her look like a prostitute. Ellie, honey, your twin is supposed to be the dumb one.

    Also, Rusche, have to admit I got hung up on “oneathose”. O neat, hose? On eat hose? One at hose… Oh, one OF those. I understand it emphasizes his pronouncing it quickly, as one word, though personally I’d have still separated it, only with dashes, “one-a-those”.

    But I guess we are just two very different people.

        1. Yeah, and you should never assume your train hijacking/time machine shove will happen on time.

    1. I also thought that the final panel gave off a strong “prostitute” vibe. But look at how happy those flowers make her. Anyone taking bets that one of those flower arrangements ends up forcibly inserted into Danny sometime soon?

  17. I love Ellie’s expression in the last panel. (Even more then the awesome, starry eyed chibi face, which surprises me.)

    She is totally digging those flowers.

    It makes the coming doomed stupidity of her employer all the more sad.

    1. Is it still grand theft auto if the former owner is still embedded in the side of the van after you punted him through a hotel wall and into it?

        1. Well I definitely don’t want the Dodge Viper with Eddie Murphy stuck in the tail pipe. I’m not going to fall for that gag. Do you happen to have a Barbie Nissan 280SX with Ken mounted on the front hood like a trussed up deer that was owned by a J.I. Goe who only drove it to war on Sundays?

  18. I love the way her face looks in the last panel. All grown up now! Such a change from her near chibi-ness when it all started. Which was fine too, artistic growth is a good thing.

  19. I believe that my first non parental hotel stay was Sr. trip in high school. Bun dork of an ex best friend actually tried to throw a beat down on meh because he was all stupid from boot camp the prior summer. I laughed it off.

  20. Caleb better be swallowing hard right now. Danny goes trying something serious it could be a sexual harassment lawsuit in the making. But then, there’s likely not much of an employment agreement between the company and Ellie….

    1. Are you kidding me? BARREL knows, pumpkin knows, Quinn knows that Ellie’s not back for the evening and might start bitching about being ditched like KK except her crap is there and the cat isn’t. Two other people at the convention know Ellie has a booth bunny job. And Caleb isn’t on top of Danny with the yanking of the American bank account. I do not foresee a decent night.

  21. Ellie gonna do something stupid. Girl is about as clueless right now as it gets, and getting bowled over. Aiming to please + buying what Billie is selling right now + for some reason left the show still in the slut clothes… oh well. Every hot girl has those mistakes in her rear view mirror.

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