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Final Assault Part 2

He's not really Fake Spiderman. He's Fake Liquid Snake. I got some more fan art to show you. I think. I guess it is. Someone, who's a fan, paid someone else to make it (I have no idea who, mind you.) But that should probably be enough to qualify. You can head over to the FanArt page to see it. It's Tarra... annnnnd someone thinks Tarra is quite the sexy. It's more or less SFW, but if you have nosey cubical neighbors it may make you look pervy. :P

170 thoughts on “Final Assault Part 2

    1. You might want to walk down the Nerf section of your local wally world. Or Target, Toys are them, what ever. Or the water cannons that are available. It got real a long time ago.

      I just wish I got the Nerf two handed sword, back when it was available. Or the mace. The mace was sweet. Or the two handed ax, or the one handed one.

      1. If you stumble thru the toy dept now, you might find a Nerf ZombieStrike ninja sword.

        With *that* crowd is pursuit, I almost expect them to shout a battle-cry of “Cobraaaaaaaa!!!”

      2. Oh, I have Jeff- and I even own the Nerf claymore. You should see how it scatters children… until they hose me with the Nerf Sniper Rifle with optional 40 dart Drum magazine.

    2. Cower before my superior firepower!

      Yea, I know I said I was leaving but I saw this baby on my way out and got caught up in the moment. BRAAAAAAID!!

      1. That would be “no one,” sadly. Closest was probably “My First Belt-Fed Crew-Served Machine Gun,” though that has neither belt nor crew as it is mounted.

    1. All the elements are there, certainly. It’s a Friday morning, his knees are at chin-height and he’s being invited to suck on assorted balls. Just got to put them together!

        1. It was the Ikea of dirty jokes. Everything you needed was there, complete with pictographs for assembly.

  1. Oh shit, he’s after the braid. He’s far more diabolical than I had imagined. Not sure how he got the nerds to give up their quest for hoverboards though.

    1. And yow, that was a little more of Tarra than I was expecting to see. Not a bad piece, but yea, I don’t think having it on my monitor at work would go over well.

    2. Given that the boards and the braid are in the same place, it’s less a matter of “giving up” and more a matter of “working with.”

      1. Yea, but you know some of them just hung back to split up the other three. Why go through all that hassle to chase down one more? Seems like more energy than most nerds would be able to muster.

        Speaking of which the nerd between Bizarro Spidey and Wheelchair ninja looks shockingly like me. Totes.

        1. This is relatively mild. Some forums I’ve used the same avatar for literally years without changing it. Others was almost a daily occurence. It’s all based on a complex sliding scale that factors in ease of recognition, the amount of other members who regularly post, and my bizarre whims. In case where I want to change often but not lose recognition I tend to “theme” avatar. For instance at one forum every avatar was a psychotic Anime female. (Not entirely why I settled on that particular niche but once I did, boy did I run with it.) and that one changed VERY often. Long story short (I knowm, too late) I usually prefer to change up my avatars. Though in my defense if my doppleganger hadn’t appeared I had planned on sticking with evil Cinnamon for a long time.

        2. Fair enough. I like this one, though; got it at random, came to enjoy the look of implied snark. There’s more going on behind the lazy one than would be expected….

        3. Actually, both of the nerds are between Bizarro Spidey and Wheelchair ninja; one is just further back, so which are you, the fat boy or {shudder} Mr. Soul Patch..?

        4. That’s a goatee, not a soul patch. I personally have a VanDyke but below the lip I keep it it trimmed very similar to the dude in my current gravvy. I wonder if Chris would accept a commission to add hair to the upper lip of that pic for my gravvy? Hmm…

    1. It’s just a few guys out for some fun the day after Thanksgiving. Driving little cars, shooting toy guns, trying to grab the last hoverboard. You know how it is!

      All they need is a barbecue after.

        1. Sadly I have seen people waiting outside of best buy tailgating waiting fur the deals. Hell they even had a false screen and where watch the game.

  2. Obviously, this is Valentines Tarragon – perfect at whatever she puts her mind to.
    Thank the Titans I don’t work in a cubicle!

    1. Yeah, seriously, what is this? Austin Powers?

      Course, we have to remember that this is taking place in a toy store on Black Friday. That ups the difficulty plenty.

    2. Remember this is cool lawyer muzzled world where more dangerous toys are on the market. Ginger’s zip past on the scooter was fast enough to knock several guys off their feet. I’d guess these hotwheels probably can do at least 30mpg by the similar standard of toys being the fun things we wish we’d had as opposed to what sane parents would buy or companies could market without getting sued to oblivion.

        1. I think it would be wise to avoid NSFW stuff for now. We don’t want to give people the wrong impression of the comic.

        2. Rule 34; I’d be surprised if there isn’t some already out there, if you knew where to look.

          But yeah, I doubt that Chris would want to host any of it – he works hard to illustrate his intent with the characters, so it makes sense that he wouldn’t undermine his efforts by inviting the audience to interpret his characters as inconsistent with his intent.

        3. And on that matter, I would consider it sacrilidge to even discuss the possibility of anything that would be past NC-13, or various forms of japanese manga for that matter as well.

          How many people took rule 34 to “War of the Worlds” or well, don’t have to for “Brave New World” would they? Maybe a 43 and go all Ferrengi where the NSFW would be a G Disney movie with Mary Poppins all dressed for the North Pole on Christmas Eve.

        4. I can’t spell, and the same movie code was applied to the manga as well. I would perhaps suggest younger than teen for that matter. If I remember some of the culture, they may be a bit more open at the high school age then might be kosher for Disney. . . However, considering some of the crap they’ve been putting out, it might be better to create a new high water mark of morality.

          And perhaps because I think that it’s not needed to go 34. Not one bit. Why do people have to go 34? For one thing, I think that it’s a slight against the artist or creator and two, it’s a self serving piece of crap that would even venture into 34 for their own twisted reasons.

          But that’s my $0.02.

        5. None of that answers the question I asked you.

          But I suppose it was somewhat of a rhetorical question anyway. I was pointing out the irony of saying it is sacrilegious to discuss something while simultaneously discussing it yourself.

        6. No, because I don’t think that it’s sacrilegious to talk about things that don’t interest other people, since I can just ignore things that don’t interest me.

        7. Yeah, I seem to recall Rusche mentioning something in the area of not wanting his comic to go that direction. So I’d imagine that while sexually themed NSFW fan art might be out there, he’d ignore and probably not link to and be quite unlikely to repost.

          Now, there might be some standard American sensibilities for that though, as I don’t recall anything regarding violence/horror direction, so that might be considered ok. For example Tarra fighting some lovingly rendered zombies that were attacking bystanders, or maybe a ratcharkantula attack in progress and/or aftermath.

        8. Yeah I’d accept gore before nudity. But I’m not a total prude. There will be adult situations in the future, but nothing censor-worthy. And honestly, I think that is the first and only commission/fan art that I wasn’t alerted to by the artist. If anyone finds any, totally tell me. It’s actually flattering people find my crude drawings attractive.

        9. Didn’t mean to imply prudishness, just mentioning where I thought you set boundaries for this particular incarnation of your art.

          Boundaries are reasonable things that keep the chaos away. Most things that try to exist without boundaries of some form end up dying away due to lack of direction to continue or everyone being too confused to follow.

        10. And that would be the other side of the coin on my objection to people going 34 on Chris’ work. It rips his work to shreds. Rends the depth of the character away from the image and just creates a pathetic 2D representation of (fill in the blank, I don’t want to go there and type it even) mentality to even approach the 34 on his work.

          Chris has characters that are worthy of life, breath, sweat, tears and blood. Which is more than I can say for some of the… well, I’m not going to go there. Maybe to suggest that they be put on the other side of the plexiglass panel in Resident Evil 3. You know, that one guy who took the picture. He can be on the other side of the glass.

        11. Okay so the number 34 is being thrown around a bit here, so in case people need it, here’s the definition:

          Rule 34: If it exists, there is porn of it. No exceptions.

          So while saying that somebody “goes to 34”, it’s not like saying “turn it up to 11”. It’s not that people have a choice to make pornographic parody of something – Rule 34 implies that someone somewhere out there has already done it.

        12. I don’t even want to consider it being a rule. A rule implies that Scientific credibility, albiet fictional scientific credibility, has established it as a norm of society. I wouldn’t even call it a theory. And I would much rather take a 20 pound sledge hammer to a bunch of bananas before even combining the two ever again.

        13. So, like most internet memes then?

          I mean it’s just called Rule 34, that doesn’t make it scientific theory or a societal norm or anything.

        14. Personally I have no problem with nudity, if it fits the comic. The first chapter of The Meek features Angora running around all nekkid, but it’s tasteful and it makes sense for her character – she’s just not at all that concerned with such minor details as wearing clothes. It’s an innocent nudity, not sexual; it fits the comic. I think it would actually hurt the comic to censor it.

          In contrast, having read through Shotgun Shuffle, which has come a long way, I don’t feel like it makes sense to introduce gratuitous nudity as there just isn’t any place for it. It would take value away from the characters, by portraying them as different than what you intended (yes, while this may sound like an open comment to the Shotgun Shuffle comment-section community, it has in fact been directed at Chris this whole time). It would hurt the comic to post that stuff here.

          That’s not to say other people shouldn’t make their parodies if they feel the need to. Frankly I don’t care. I’m just saying I wholly support not posting it here.

        15. Agreed. Adding content in a sexually explicit direction would seem jarring for this comic. On the other hand lack of sexually explicit content from a “Life & Times of Juniper Buckingham” comic would seem kinda’ weird too.

          Boundaries can be set as things like “targeting adult audience and not more than X comics in a row without some nudity” too. It’s inconsistent vision that’s weird, not just different vision.

          It’s also good to be clear so people know what they’re getting into and if they’re uncomfortable with the vision chosen, they’re able to know quickly and avoid it.

        16. A vision that is consistent or has a clear direction, both in the comic and spanning across all official pages on the website (including author-acknowledged fan art), yes.

  3. Have you never seen the awesomeness of Roll Fizzlebeef and Space Mutany? Nothing says action like future space shampooers chaing each othe in the basement of a space factory.

        1. Ginger= Puma Fastrope
          Tarragon= Ace Firesnap
          Anise= Shadow Uppunch
          Juniper=Floozy Tunnelsnake
          Lavender= Chop Manelot
          Cinnamon= Stiff Eyeglare
          Pumpkin= Toss Cosgal
          Quinn= Sam Jones

    1. There’s a movie reference here… Spaceballs maybe?

      I know someone says, “Oh balls” out there in the visual media arts.

      I can’t think of it. hang on.

      I got nothing.

      1. No movie reference. It’s just an expression. I’m unsure of its origins, but I think it’s just an updated form of the British phrase “oh bollocks”.

        1. You’re probably right, but if I had to look up a movie clip of someone else repeating every two-word expression I read on the internet, well, I wouldn’t have time for much else. Better to just read “oh balls” and think “that’s a funny expression because there are balls”.

        2. I know, there is that. I mean, it’s like using British idioms about bloody and stuff. bloody this, bloody that. It’s just about as equatable to the vernacular of “dag nab it”, or the more invocative version “g-d damn it”

          But then combining the aforementioned with the British use of rubber instead of a pencil eraser, really seems to be pushing the envelope in Organic Chemistry when the professor is from the U.K., and you’re the class clown.

        3. Mr. Blue would have to watch it again to find the reference, but I believe that the Alien in “Monsters Vs. Aliens” may have used the phrase “oh balls” or “oh spaceballs” I’d have to check.

        4. Whoa, “I’d have to check”? That must have been said in a movie one time. ;)

          But if someone else saying “oh balls” is really what you need, Google tells me Penny on BBT says it all the time.

    1. But it’s not the “Pink is Canon” Nerd. The only way I can see him in this chase would be if he broke out two of the hoverboards and is chasing and/or cutting off Mr. Grey with a board on each foot while hoverboard skiing, being pulled by Backwards Burglar.

  4. I just the the “Fan Art” of Tarra. I made me wonder if one of Tarragon’s many achievements would be having the cover of the Sports Illustrated swim suit issue. It’s a guy thing I know, but it would interesting to see.

    1. She is a fictional comic character you pervert. But yes she (along with the whole clan (pumpkin excluded fur now because of age) is the hottest.

        1. Tarra doesn’t get silver for anything so she ties Ellie for the gold (there is Olympic precedent, it does happen) leaving the bronze for Anise who edges out the other competition based on her perky goth bonus points.

        2. That is my order too ( leaving Pumpkin out because of age) it would be followed by Ginger Cinnamon and Juniper. Still this could all change once the Eigth Sister comes into play.

      1. Influx of new people will keep it balanced. Genius way for large population areas for keeping the influx balanced and still have a good reputation.

  5. One time in MGS3 I got on the turret in the desert mountain at the very top as helicopters continued to flow in and fired them and everyone else down one by one as I screamed “THIS IS THE POWER OF STEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEALTH!”

    1. I did pretty much the same thing the first time I played that section. The real pay off was later in the game there is that sequence where you encounter EVERY person Snake has killed to that point. I started cracking up at the mini parade of chopper pilots that appeared. It was like, “oh yea, I definitely remember killing them.”

      1. One of the most fun things to do is to run around with skeleton face-paint shirtless with a shotgun and yelling out “STEALTH!” every time you shoot someone.

        1. He didn’t mention a boombox blasting Dueling Banjos on repeat, so yeah, that doesn’t sound like real life to me.

          I haven’t played any of the Metal Gear Solid games, though, so I can’t say for certain.

        2. The third one is still my favorite. I could rant for hours about the design flaws of the series and the unfettered hatred I have for 2 and 4 but 3 ranks in my top ten games of all time. I highly recommend it if you have the means.

  6. Does wheelchair ninja want her actual braid??? As a trophy? Surely he doesn’t know about the sister fights, but it would be interesting I’d he wanted to cut the braid off.

    But no, I realize he’s just referring to tarra.

    1. “The Braid” as a nickname for her as an adversary shows respect. Much better than something like “Baby Teeth” or “Man Hands”.

      1. That’s what Mr. Blue thinks. Wheelchair ninja is so mad right now, he can only fixate on the one major part of his nemesis’s attributes. Maybe it’s how he ended up in a wheelchair in the first place. T H E B R A I D.

      2. I initially read it as he wanted to take her braid as a trophy but the context of putting it in quote marks and the words “alive and unspoiled” make it seem more like he’s talking about Tarra herself. Speaking of which, when you think about it the use of the word “unspoiled” raises the question, what exactly are they planning to do if they catch the girls? Sounds like something more sinister than taking the hoverboards.

        1. I’ve been debating whether or not to explain in this story why Ninja’s pursuing her. But yeah, he’s referring to Tarra herself as “The Braid.” Which is intended to mean “Bring her to me, intact.” As in ‘don’t hurt her.”

        2. I got their eventually. It just took me a re-read. But it’s always nice to have word of god confirmation that you’re on the right track.

        3. I’ve always thought using “Let me put it this way, how well can you tread water?” as a threat would be amusing to get to do in real life. Also helpful from a legal stance if there’s no sufficient standing water nearby for it to be a credible threat.

        4. Well, what if you lead it off with a “Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight, let me put it to you this way, ‘How well can you tread water?'” But then, you could always throw the name Noah in there.

          “Riiiiight. Noah, let me put it to you this way, ‘How well can you tread water?'”

        5. That’s too many clues. If they can’t figure it out from the question, then they deserve the confusion. I mean, it’s someone I feel it’s appropriate to threaten, after all. Can’t be too merciful.

      1. If Tarra is slutting it up does that mean we get to swap titles now? I already know the answer, but I like asking anyway …sigh…

        By the way, what the hell is going in this store? It looks like a bomb went off or something.

        1. He would be lying face down if he didn’t have his current condition. Having driven the Escalade backwards like a forklift, he jibbed when he should have zigged, ramming the rear of the powerwheel into one of the many iron support poles that dot the sales floor of the embattled Toys ‘R’ Us. Of course, backing into a pole at full speed does leave little ability for having a new way of looking at life, let alone your own butt. Matthew had given himself a new feature, but others could not see. Having borken his nose on the pole, his torso was face down, legs stuck in the steering wheel of the Escalade, while his tongue was hanging out of his unconscious mouth facing the rafters. The same rafters where an Electrical condiut was severed and had just produced an arc and sparks with a violent flash.

          Sparks were floating down quickly towards Matthew’s tongue. Would he awake from his concussive stupor? Would the newest lady to walk in take pity on him? Will this dialogue ever end?

          Stay tuned, because it takes three licks to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Tootsie Pop.

      1. Carefully. Talk like that may convince someone to draw Lavander in such clothing. Or is that what you want you pervy puppy?

  7. So where are the cops? I know daddy is the chief but you think he would at least send a few black and whites to claim the riot down.

        1. Every few months or so I Google Shotgun Shuffle to see if anyone new is linking-in, or reviews no one tells me about. I like to see if there’s any criticism (since I need to read crit, but most people are too polite to email me personally, or comment on here.)

        2. And I was thinking you were some weird guy who just searches night and say fur such items while peeing in mason jars and eating nothing but delivery pizza and dime noodles. Also, does that police dept even use the black and white design on there cars. Most Florida cops don’t and I should know this as I am a huge fan if police cars and vehicles.

        3. After calling Steve on a lingerie reference you want to encourage furry fanfic interpretations?

          Aside from questions of taste, you might start fights with any furry fans of this comic due to disagreements about which is the most dangerous animal, as Tarra would obviously have to be derived from that.

        4. Doesn’t WordPress have capabilities to identify how people are getting to your site so that if somebody posts a link and then somebody clicks on it, you know right away?

        5. Google Analytics? If not that, then perhaps through the URL service. Incoming stuff based on ISP to the URL ISP and then from the URL ISP to the link click through perhaps?

        6. Usually when you click on a link, your web browser sends the HTTP referer as part of the request to the new site. I’ve used it myself in web app development, but am not very familiar with third party analytical software. So I assume Google Analytics would do the trick.

          Still, I thought WordPress had something built in, like where you could actually get a list of sites with direct links to pages on your site, but I don’t remember.

        7. Well, there’s always the info that he put in the post comment for comic Go Where The Answers Are (30 April 2013, refraining from link so Rusche doesn’t need to moderate this).

          But that’s just search terms, and the referrer will just tell you where someone came when they came from a link or ad elsewhere. That won’t tell him where the person who came from an ad and bookmarked it and came back to look 6 months later came from (nothing really will that I’m aware of), and it won’t tell him if I started a fan site somewhere and didn’t otherwise notify him.

        8. My thought was if you create a relevant fan site (or a review or some fan art or a card game or a commemorative plate collection) that even if you didn’t notify Chris you would still probably include a link to the source subject (this comic), and that if somebody clicks that link then Chris would know from where the person came, could follow the referrer URL, and see the derivative site/art/stuff.

          But yes, if someone were to create one of the above things without posting a link to the source subject (which would just be rude IMO), then yes I can see that a google search would be in order.

        9. True. However I did do a Google image search on the Tarra picture and found the DA site for the artist. He referenced it as “Tarragon (Tarra) from the webcomic Shotgun Shuffle” or something along those lines, but didn’t link. I checked a few others in his gallery and similar tendency with all. On the other hand, what I’ve seen on DA in the past an attribution by name without link isn’t uncommon.

          Also, I found Google’s interpretation of “similar images” to that to be hilarious. I highly recommend doing the image search just for that even if you aren’t curious about the original artist.

  8. NO WHEELCHAIR NINJA!!! NO!!! Don’t lose yourself in the chase, keep your identity strong! Granted, “Pink Powerwheel Ninja” has some alliteration going on, but it just doesn’t have the same ring!

      1. Keeping the hospital slippers makes much more sense than keeping the hospital gown, although since he can’t stand he wouldn’t have to worry about mooning bystanders.

        So would his ninja clan disown him for the hospital slippers when not part of a disguise, or just crack jokes about it? Or did Tarra leave any of them to do so?

        1. I’ve seen lots of hospital slippers with plenty of stealth potential. I was going more the angle of laughing at him for willingly wearing them, kinda’ like if you came into the office and the guy next cube/office/desk over was wearing a tiara and a tutu because his daughter put them on him last night, yet for some reason he’s still wearing them now (put back on after shower, or at least didn’t remove after he got in his car and she couldn’t see him anymore).

        2. Also funny when they wear something like that because they are too fierce to care what others think. Like The Beast in Kung Fu Hustle. You don’t need to worry about your crappy slippers when you can stop a bullet with just two fingers.

  9. I just did a quick peek around online for other Shotgun Shuffle artwork, I love the fact that Google helpfully gives me other things to narrow the search like “Ellie,” “card,” “comic,” and “rule 34.”

    It personally makes me really wish I had any kind of art skills I could take any satisfaction in, because there’s all sorts of things I’d love to draw for the comic, but have way too much fear that it would be terrible and shameful to ever show it.

    I find it almost disturbing that the ninja wants the braid “unspoiled.” Just what does he expect the deep nerds to do to her once they catch her? Sit on her? Shoot her eye out?

    …man, I’m trying to think of more things to comment on, but most stuff is already posted.

    As for fanart to be “risque” or anything, for some reason I find myself thinking about the artwork on the covers of Zenescope comic titles. The stories inside are sometimes quite good…but man, the artwork on the cover makes you think it’s going to be nothing but pin-ups and scantily clad women running around either having pillow fights or murdering each other.

    I think you /can/ have sexy and tasteful artwork and I’m not opposed to it, I just somewhat agree that the site would need to be careful to share or link to any specific type of explicitness. Years ago I was a regular follower of It’s Walky! and it got to the point that people would just draw a quick sketch of a character standing around naked and slap it online like it wasn’t a big deal. It almost felt like it cheapened the comic somehow.

    I don’t want that to happen here, but the cast is so great that if there aren’t a few attempts at pushing the boundries I’d be a bit disappointed as long as they don’t go too far.

    1. Generally my searches regarding this site are if I’m trying to find a comment, but a quick, and mostly fruitless, fan art search did bring up some fan art that didn’t make it to the fan art page, and that’d be some of the sister comment avatars. Those would be good inclusions and could be credited to the Buckingham name still if preferred.

      One of the nice things about online anonymity is that you can attempt the fan art if you want, and if it’s horrible you don’t have to let it leave your house/computer.

  10. *scene cuts to the boys with William at the grocery store magazine rack* “Dad, why is ain’tTarra dressed like that on the Sports Illustrated? And on WWE Magazine, and Women’s Health, and Fitness… ?”

    1. Because when your Aunt Tarra comes to play, she plays to win. All magazines found their pictures of other models spontaneously combusted, image files corrupted to white noise, and cameras exploded when attempting to take pictures of other women.

      There are actually a lot of vacationing families who’re quite upset with your aunt right now, not to mention the people who take family pictures for a Christmas card at Thanksgiving. Not that they can do anything more than stare sullenly at her, though.

      1. I don’t think “sullenly” is the correct description for the way, most of the male (and some of the female) half is staring at the picture.

        1. Agreed about that picture, I was more thinking about her as a person for the people who couldn’t get their Christmas card picture or that picture of their wife holding their small child up by an arbitrary landmark.

          Which was a figurative sullen look assuming they all magically knew why their cameras exploded as opposed to her being present and telling them. Which doesn’t help with clarity when I don’t state it to start with.

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