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No Apartment For Old Men

86 thoughts on “No Apartment For Old Men

    1. I assumed he meant the cameras that weren’t found but it could be a red herring. WHO KNOOOOWS what he’s looking for!

      Hell, maybe he took 2 of the cameras himself to scare out the girls.

      1. Cameras are all accounted for. Quinn found 3 empty boxes. McFatFat passed two into the litter box that she found. The one the girls aren’t sure about was taped to the back of Danny’s door.

        There’s a mystery something that he’s apparently searching for, not sure we have any idea what it is, but I’m guessing it predates Quinn’s moving into the apartment. I think Tired Guy wants them to search everything. Hence the “tracker” to scan boxes that they help move without being obvious.

        1. A few pages back he showed them recpits for mics that were never found, I think thats what it is they are looking for since its the reason the girls are moving out.

        2. That’s the reason that they are moving, but he’s been after that apartment for a long time so who knows…

        3. Yeah, I don’t think he cares about any microphones (which may or may not still be present). His goal predates Danny’s involvement.

        4. Since he sublet to Danny boy, he’d have access to all of the equipment in there if that stuff was left behind. And that would include the wireless router, computers, screen, etc. And he’d have the right to sell that stuff as he’d be the landlord so to speak.

        5. Great, that’s all we need, a Chinese take on an O’Jacks breakfast item.

  1. And, the real scam behind the dating site scam moves forward. What is it they seek? Who put it there? Will someone ever find love? What is the air speed of a swallow?

  2. Rusche used the archaic word wench to show the tired guy is from an earlier time even though it’s use by tired guy is still a bit anachronistic. Serving wench in the medieval themed dinner + show venues aside, the word is seldom used today, or 50 years ago for that matter.

    1. Wench isn’t uncommon even now, try actually using it to refer to a girl, it’s familiar enough for pretty much all of them to take offense to it. Even more so amongst the Renne Faire crowd.

  3. Did they ever actually account for all the cameras? Tired guy could be any footage it may have recorded. Though now that I actually typed that I don’t think they stored footage locally, it looked like it was all remote to Danny’s apartment.

    And he’s been weird about that apartment since long before Danny came into the picture. Hmm…

    1. And this is totally a comment I was too late to make on the last comic… How did I miss the gratuitous use of 80’s lasers in the background of his profile photo? Rock on James.

    2. Mentioned above, but Quinn found three empty boxes and two cameras in the litter box. There was a camera taped to the peephole of Danny’s door. So I think we the readers know where all the cameras are but the girls may think one is still unaccounted for. Tired Guy may or may not know but probably doesn’t care.

    1. Buy Ellie a fancy new litter box that will monitor when it comes back out. Slip something in McFatFat’s food to help pass it when they determine it’s in use. I’m not getting the feeling they’re going to blow their cover to the girls all that quickly.

  4. I wouldn’t be surprised if it was the Necronomicon or something like that. Something someone hid from them in an apartment that once belonged to someone else.

    Or they are looking for something Ellie’s older, adventurous sister may have stashed among Ellie’s things. I’m thinking this all loops back around in that direction somehow.

  5. I WAS RIGHT!!!!

    (From Flanked) “So……. someone stole something from old guy and hid it in the duct work of the girls apartments, and he’s been slowly purchasing the leases of the surrounding apartments to cut off access to theirs, and now it’s just a matter of getting them removed so he can purchase the lease of that apartment and finally gain access to the something that’s hidden there?”

    1. Which then begs the question, is his dating site just a part of this long con? Meaning will it fold up and vanish (leaving Ellie jobless once again) as soon as he finds whatever the hell it is he’s after. Dun Dun DUNNN…

      1. With a floor plan for the Pentagon marked up on the wall, I’m guessing retrieval of said object isn’t the entirety of his plan. We don’t know what function the dating site serves.

  6. Warning to all Patreons, Patreon reported a hack so you should log in and change your password there.

    Details I saw (haven’t looked fully yet) stated registered names, e-mail addresses, physical addresses, and salted password hashes were stolen for normal users. Creators could’ve had their encrypted social security numbers and tax ID info stolen too (so maybe ok, just depends on how/where they stored the key and if it was generated well).

    Salted password hashes shouldn’t be that dangerous, but still a good idea to change the password. Especially if you are a person who shares passwords between websites (then changing for all using it would be good, ideally to different ones, software like Password Safe or KeePass can help with that).

    1. Gah! It had to happen while the one year anniversary was coming up for SGS! Can you believe roughly a year ago the doors were going to close on this comic?

  7. It’s unfortunate, but I will have to stop doing Patreon. I know it’s shutting the door after all the dogs ran out, but Patreon’s security breach is just one breach too many.

    1. I’m not pleased about it, but if the measures they took are as stated (salted & hashed passwords, 2048-bit encrypted SSN & tax ID, not storing the full credit card numbers in the same system that was breached), then I’m not going to consider it that much of a black mark as much as an unfortunate consequence of the world we live in today.

      I get much more pissed at say Anthem, JP Morgan Chase, or obviously OPM. They have much more sensitive data (and additional legal standards to comply to) and should have pretty damn good budgets for this stuff and the aftermath shows they ignored a LOT more best practices.

      The main thing I do as mitigation is making sure I have different passwords for different sites, multiple credit cards for different levels of confidence (the one I put on Patreon is not my high confidence card), and avoid making accounts where I don’t need them (such as any and all webcomics I read that have account creation possibilities, even this one). That plus some browser plugins and I consider it good enough.

      1. Even 128-bit encryption would be good, provided they had rotating keys and a different set for each type of data. I personally enjoy coming up with encryption schemes to make stolen data as frustrating as possible to recover.

        1. I don’t recall many algorithms that still give much resistance at 128-bit, and since SSN & tax ID is only really relevant for creators, they can publicly check how much they’re pulling in from Patreon to try to determine who’s ID is best worth getting info to steal.

          If you wanna’ make the cryptanalysis bastardly, I’d say have a separate, much more hardened system (say the one that they presumably use for full credit card details) and set it to get a value that is XOR’d with the final crypttext before it’s stored. The value would be based upon something esoteric like the hashed passwords of the creator’s third, 23rd, 101st, and 37th patron along with the seventh patron to back them and then stop backing them and the old password hash for every fifth patron of theirs that changed their password. And it would be different for everyone and not documented anywhere outside the secure machine how it’s determined for anyone. The secure machine also has no network card, so they use something like a closed BR-R disk to feed it the output data of the web server to get the data they send to the bank through yet a third machine firewalled off from all but the bank and the IRS (and foreign equivalents). A daily CD-R is probably fine to set up new creator accounts. That seems like a fun one to try to crack.

        2. Disney is dead. However, the sunshine is lovely this time of year.

        3. It depends on what you do with the data before you encrypt it and how many encryption keys are involved. The thing that always gets left out of the math (for how hard something is to break) is accounting for the program to know it’s actually broken the decryption. I can’t go into the details for the former, beyond saying there’s more that can be done with plain data prior to encrypting it than putting a few characters of junk on either side, which make it complicated or prohibitively expensive to use what you decrypted even if you know you succeeded at it. As to the latter, the easiest way to break encryption is to go after a record where you already know what the unencrypted value should be, then reuse the key/method, which has limited value when multiple keys are used and no value when everyone has their own key and salt.

        4. Salting everything certainly helps, and adding an initial step to make the decrypted result harder to recognize could help too. Certainly different keys as well.

          However, with all of these things there’s also the possibility of getting to the point I frequently did trying to invent new types of knots as a little kid. Sometimes the attempted random twists and turns leaves an easier path to untie (such as retrieval method for different keys or my random values for XOR, etc).

        5. I’ve personally found protecting data to be one of the more enjoyable parts of the computer world.

  8. I’ll just do a flat comment on the Patreon issue – feel free to ask questions:

    The hack did not expose credit card information. Mostly because they did not keep the database that stores user information in the same location with the payment processor. On top of that, the payment processor did not store credit card numbers directly. It contains referral codes to another payment processor that does store credit card info, and pays Patreon people. Any attempt to use the method that Patreon has to garner illegal payment/funding will not work – the client and use is specific in these instances.

    I know this, I work for one of the world’s largest credit processors in the world (First Data). We always work with payment processing when there are these kinds of issues, mostly to prepare for fraud reports and such. Luckily, Patreon is better protected than most other sites similar to it (such as DeviantArt – I’ve been trying to warn them for years after a lot of fraud reporting has been going on there).

    1. I’m pretty happy with Patreon’s response in general. Notification in under two days and good security practices. Unless they’re unlucky enough to have a weak key bug for their encryption (something like CVE-2008-0166, also spelled out at wiki.debian.org/SSLkeys ), which wouldn’t be their fault, then I’d say it’s minimal impact to creators or patrons.

      Still good idea for people to change their password for that site and any other sites they used the same password for, though.

  9. Tired Guy is DB Cooper. He made his way to Florida from the Pacific Northwest and lost his ransom when he hid it in the building materials of an apartment complex that was under construction at the time.

    This is totally plausible and I’m calling it now. Rusche can mail me my royalty checks when the plot unfurls completely.

      1. Sure!

        Well, I mean… maybe he contracted Dheu to grab him out of midair and port him across the country. It’s the Shuffleverse. Anything can happen, right?

        1. It was suggested that he was in his mid 40s in 1971. Sooooo 2015 – 1971 comes out to be an additional 44 years. That, and let’s go with 44 for the mid forties suggested by the F.B.I. and he’d be 88 years old. I’ve known some spry 88 year olds. Hell, I’ve met a veteran who is 100 years old and can still cut a rug and get around as well as a decently aged 50 year old, with a slight limp.

          So if it is D.B. Cooper, is the oxygen a feint?

  10. Well, he SAYS his name is Dick. However, he tends to make statements that are patently untrue. I’m not sure I believe him even about his name at this point.
    He’s giving me a ‘grifter’ vibe at this point.

    1. Who says that they’re empty?

      I mean his great granddaughter, his niece, his grand niece, his great niece and maybe a nephew as well.

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