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Pumpkin Chunkin’

Titles are subject to change. I did this before as we grew closer to the conclusion of Chapter 2, so I'll so it again. This won't be the end of Chapter 3. This is only the first half. We'll go on to meet the character everyone voted for in the poll a while back before that happens. I've been working on a strip for THAT chapter conclusion for over a month now. It's called "The Chain" and proves to be quite long (as long as it still loads reasonably for normal reading.) So I sat on break yesterday and hashed out exactly how many 1 tiered strips it would take to finish out this story and not miss anything I needed to cover, and this is what I got. It doesn't really spoil anything, but you can certainly draw some conclusions if you'd like. Again, these are 1 tier. Any combining or last minute expansions will throw this quickly out of sync. #256 should be the end, with #257 starting our second half. We'll be past Valentine's Day before we even get to Denny's. =)) Thanks all. 228-Pumpkin Chunkin' 229-The Hot Girl 180 II 230-Window Shopping 231-Hungover 232-Irritable Sister Syndrome-1 233-Irritable Sister Syndrome-2 234-Juniper 2.0 235-Batwoman 236-Back to the Start 237-That Bitch is No Good for You 238-You're So Evil 239-Police Chief Commissioner 240-High Tension 241-Stuck in the middle with you 242-Only if it's Pink 243-Somebody's Gonna Get Their Head Kicked in Tonight 244-We are Pumpagon 245-The Two Playskool Towers 246-Tubthumping 247-Chairs v Wheels 248-Only I didn't Say Fudge.. 249-Gold Dust Woman 250-Register One, No Waiting 251-Hard Feelings 252-Nemisis 253-Sister X 254-Seven Wonders 255-On Your Own Time 256-The 9th Sister 257-Out of Season 258-Last Resorts 259-Interconvention 260-See You Space Cowboy..

144 thoughts on “Pumpkin Chunkin’

  1. Sweet! I notice some striking similarities between the employees and some people I know, not to mention the bedding dept. That is fantastic.

      1. Whoops.

        All characters are fictional creations. Any similarity between the copyright and trademarked characters utilized in Shotgun Shuffle and real persons are just coincidental.

      2. I was, in fact, working there Thanksgiving night. I was responsible for cleaning up the mess in the bedding department.

      1. I hope those hoverboards are well packaged to survive the impact of a Pumpkin at what I’m guessing is at least 30 MPH.

        1. Well, I think that Jesse Owens was doing 21 mph or better in the Berlin Olypmics, so Pumpkin to get there with the fat guy having a head start and all with time to spare, I’d suggest 35 m.p.h. I just hope that she either lands feet first or on the hoverboard activating it.

      1. I’m thinking it’s an alien symbiote and the source of Tarra’s power. Or maybe watching SpiderMan 3 while drunk within the past week is sticking with me.

    1. I know a guy who has every DVD release of each Star Wars movie, just because it’s Star Wars, but everything has more Star Wars stuff. While on the one hand a person would say that it’s merchandising and such, the other hand suggests an overtly maniacal obsession with that stuff.

    2. I was highly amused by that as well. Given the Buckingham’s preferences, he might actually get what he wants too.

      1. Well, instead of a 40% chance of getting the board he wants, he now has a 50% chance of getting the board he wants. Provided he doesn’t have a heart attack from sprinting like that. But if he’s so knowledgeable about cannon, then maybe he’s had practice from the several comic cons that pervade the Florida peninsula.

        1. Out of curiosity, where did you get 40% and 50%? Or did I just nerd out too much trying to calculate the actually probabilities?

        2. Looking at the colors above, we have a pink, pink, orange, green, and blue. Previous strips allude to the shipment containing only five of the items. Out of a 100% chance of getting a pink, fat boy had two of five, or a 40% chance. So, with 40 our of 100, we get 40/100 –> take two out of both 40 & 100 we get 20/50. Divide both by ten and we get 2/5, which is the current ratio of colors among the items in stock.

          numbers: 40/100 –> (2/2 * (20/ 50)) —+> (10/10 * (2/2 * (2/5) ) ).

          With Mr. Yellowish – Red grabbing the blue board with her feet, that removes one item, as well as one color from the remaining items in stock available to the rest of the stampeding patrons. Who would have thought of Toys-r-Us as a china shop anyway..

          So, with Pink, Pink, Orange, Green left over, with the removal of blue (Hey. Mr. BLUE) we have four boards left with a ratio of 2 to 4 representing the number of pink boards in all the stock. 2/4 equals 1/2 which is just 50% of 1 or half of 100%.

    1. I saw this (and was gleefully amused by it) as well. Now, the question is: Did Tarra invent the game and time it’s release to provide a momentary distraction in case formations alpha, beta, gamma, delta, or mu proved necessary?

      1. I’m surprised she didn’t schedule a ‘game signing’ with her assistant who might occasionally wander off and purchase a few things.

  2. And the crowd goes wild! (see what I did there?)

    From the hidden Kerfuffle reference to the crazed fanboy and even the cheap shop at Mr. Rainbow this was a triple tier worth waiting for. Hope you had a good New Years Chris.

    And even though that wasn’t a “real” fastball special it was pretty cool. It also makes me think Tarra’s neck must be superhumanly strong.

    1. Her ‘everything’ is superhumanly strong. She won four gold medals rowing quads by herself.

      I pity/envy her significant other.

      1. Are we talking about her braid again?

        Also, I agree with TLO that this was an epic 3 tier comic, worthy of starting off the new year. So much going on, I didn’t even notice the shot at Mr. Rainbow.

      2. I wouldn’t worry about her significant other. She can fabricate and install/implant a bionic spine in under an hour. So far ears still give her trouble because she’s a perfectionist about matching and that can take four hours, but that’s the longest for any replacement body parts.

        Seriously, if Wheelchair Ninja would just admit he was in the wrong she’d give him a new spine in a snap.

        1. As a movie-based response, my reply is “Kids, it’ll grow back”

          (Tom Hanks in Dragnet talking to kids disappointed seeing lion with a mohawk).

          Nothing serious to worry about.

      3. She must not have had any (former)(surviving) significant others, as she has no x’s (see last comic’s comments). She is solo, unique, and probably serves as her own partner in such matters that require them.

  3. Nothing like a little midget tossing to start the new year right.

    (yes, I know Pumpkin’s not a midget, just not fully grown yet, but close enough because that’s the way I want to start my new year.)

  4. Ha ha, of course there are hoverboards. Man, if only I could have a sweet person-chucking hair braid like that of tarras. I’d be a halt happy girl.
    Juniper is going to get arrested. I’m sure of it. Lol

        1. *rimshot*

          Thank you, we’ll be here all week, try the veal and ask your bartender about the marriage specials. All shotguns, all the time. .

    1. Considering the title of the next comic (not sure if if was here when you posted, wasn’t there earlier today when I was on), I’m not so sure about that. Not sure who’s going to get a Hot Girl 180, but it could be any of them (though I’d guess not Pumpkin, as she’d go for cute sympathy instead and is also underage).

        1. Thanks for the info. I’ll be interested to see what kind of hot girl 180 is being described. Everyone getting into Ellie’s line and her not being able to leave? Derek spotting Cinn and volunteering to be a pack mule? …or dare I hope, (crosses fingers) Mall Santa hijinks for Anise?

          I’ll look forward to seeing what unfolds.

        2. That list with the comic names did make me wonder though just how many people reading this actually know Cowboy Bebop.

          What’s for sure though is, that the number of people who don’t is the same as the number of people who should watch it asap. The two groups being completely congruent after all.

        3. Good to see I wasn’t the only one who thought of Cowboy BeBop right after reading the list of upcoming strip titles.

          And yes, go watch it now if for whatever reason you haven’t already.

        4. Maybe we find out that in real life, The Brian married Juniper and also got her 1/2 off the dishwasher with the garbage disposal attachment.

          But wouldn’t that invalidate the disclaimer?

        5. I’m thinking Rusche’s statement that it’s not what I’m thinking is that as opposed to the Hot Girl 180 being another character changing their mind immediately (Alex regarding Ellie in original comic of that title), possibly it’s the hot girl being forced to do a 180 instead (such as Juniper leaning close enough to grab one-to-all of the tickets and then turning around and sprinting in the other direction or Ellie trying to slip away from her register under anxiety pretenses and being stopped cold).

    1. No, no- if this were a fastball special, then Tarra would be Colossus in this situation, while Pumpkin would be Wolverine.

      Sorry, my inner nerd needed to get that out.

        1. Pretzels and Mountain Dew to the inner nerds. Natural 20s all around.

          Tarra was the unknown recipient of a space borne experiment that was designed to give the laser the strength of a spider bred with Adamantium. Due to a piece of tin foil that was thrown out of SpaceLab after that Astronaut ate his tv dinner, the satellite’s trajectory and aim were thrown off and aimed directly at Tarra’s left pinky toe.

          The result of that experiment has given her superhuman skill in saving babies and the strength of four rowers. And the ability to toss dwarfs and not only a prehensile but cognitive ponytail as well.

  5. I see Pumpkins special skill is being small enough to throw, and mayhaps also being underage so she can’t be harshly prosecuted if things get really hairy.

    I am still rooting for Juni. She may not be the best and the brightest, but she has earned a voucher. She can go ahead and steal one if need be.

  6. I don’t know why, but I find the “Willy Wonka ticket” line to be absurdly funny. I just finished laughing so bad, people were coming into the break room at work to see if I’m ok, after laughing till I was in tears.

    Ah… That brightened my day considerably! Thanks for that.

    1. I think that Juniper thinks that the voucher thing is all a ridiculous attempt at crowd and damage control. I’d say that she’s more of a ca cera cera type of girl.

        1. All I can hear over that bit of dialogue is that little bit of Snake Plissken’s theme song that’d crop up in “Escape from L.A.” every now and then.

        2. Not terribly fast, at least not after falling through a ceiling. Otherwise her response to Ginger would’ve been, “Just ask? Where’s the fun in THAT?”

    2. I got it, she’s irritated at Ginger’s assumption, and has reverted to the Ways of the Sisterly Verbal Revenge in Public in order to irritate the Sister on the other end of the phone.

      Or something like that. What better way to get back at someone than to imply a lack of concern for what the goals are, and who they’re for.

  7. A few details I absolutely love:

    The fury in the eyes of the woman in panel two. Either that’s a woman whose boyfriend Juniper stole once in the past, or she’s such a stickler for the rules and regulations of retail that the /idea/ someone would find a way to cut in line simply infuriates her. Either way, it might just be the way the lights my monitor, but I could also see a red fury in her pupils.

    Panels 6 and 7: If there isn’t fanart (or an animated gif) of Tarra spinning around to become Wonder Woman soon, I’m going to be sorely disappointed in the fandom.

    Panel 8: How is James /not/ at the front of that line? His love of… memorabilia… had me convinced we’d see him in that scene somewhere.

    Great comic, Rusche, and Happy New Year.

    1. Woman in Panel 2 can actual be seen on the Contact Page. She’s one of the Customer Service Girls (a future story.)

      James should totally be in the front of that line. Shame on me. lol
      Happy New Year 2u2.

      1. Holy crap, it’s email rage girl! Good to see her appear. (For those who may not remember email rage girl was one of my past avvy’s.)

        And yea, I was another who totally expected to see James in the hoverboard mob. With possibly Eagen taking a nap nearby.

      2. James is able, through the skill of eBay manipulation, and better off than a certain British Penguin, going to purchase the board off of the internet for a paper clip.

  8. I swear Mr. Rainbow, if you screw this up I will stuff you in the sewers. Dish. Washer. Not a hard concept. And….wait, how did you get inside already? Nevermind…I probably don’t want to know.

    1. Cool yer jets sis. I got the thing for her washing whatsit. And no, you don’t want to know. But you may want to back the van up to the doors and have the back open and the engine running. If the cops arrive before I do, just remember, you aren’t technically an accomplice yet. But we should be gone before then so I wouldn’t worry too much.

      1. I brush my teeth first of course. Also…they eat mud pies. And they think it’s funny when I dominate Mr. Rainbow. Or let Ta-Mr. Redhead do it.

        1. I don’t eat mud pies! I feed them to Asperand. I just keep taking your phone a… I mean, yeah. Mud pies are awesome.

  9. I sincerely hope there’s some cushioning between those bunny ears. That is if being prepared for this very option wasn’t Pumpkin’s reason for wearing it to the raid in the first case.

  10. Greeting and Happy New Year from the Philippines! On vacation and was planning on catching up on all the installments when I got back but I had to see how Tarra and Pumpkin would get the hover board. That was hilarious! I could also feel Gingers exasperation with Juniper the New Year is starting off pretty well.

      1. Pretty warm here.. Low 80’s during the day so definitely enjoying the break from the cold weather. But looking at the news for Chicago Mother nature is going to sink her claws into me when I get back..

  11. I hope the old guy in panel two is a cardboard cutout, as the somewhat similar looking old guy from Get-Mart was.

      1. I was doing a slow archive crawl in another browser tab, and I wasn’t too far past Get-Mart, otherwise I doubt I would’ve noticed. Actually the glasses, eyebrows, & nose are different, so I think it’s just Rusche’s general “random old guy retail employee” look being similar, but I still think it’d be funny if he were cardboard.

  12. Hi everybody– delurking to say Happy New Year, and to ask:

    In the last panel, was that booster seat stuck on Pumpkin’s butt this whole time?

      1. That’s a nice thing about reading the comments. I originally missed the Kerfluffle posters, the Serta Sheep, and the booster seat.

        Good eye Le Chifforobe

        1. It does explain why we didn’t see her below the waist since the car seat got stuck there in the first place.

        1. no. cinnamon has no figure. shes just saying your lightweight, compact and like, easy to stow or something

          your the sister for people on-the-go, k?

        2. Being voted the Fun Size One at that young of an age would be a reason for her to make a sister council motion to be Too Soon To Tell instead.

        3. Doesn’t aerodynamic mean that they’ve got all the right curves in the right places for maximum aerodynamic lift due to the high pressure gradient over the top of the curves generating lower pressure below the curves thus creating a lifting force for the body in flight?

        4. So you’re comparing her to an airplane wing? Was that supposed to be more or less complimentary than “no figure?”

        5. Can’t a nerd use another way and means to say curves and curvyness ideals in a sense of humor in such a way and means to not imply cruelty, yet confuse the audience in such a way that they can appreciate the way that she can catch up to her sisters, but isn’t at the starting line?

        6. My understanding of the definition of aerodynamic is that it’s got the proper-to-ideal shape for its purpose, not specifically required to be lift. For example cars would be made to be aerodynamic to reduce drag and ideally reduce lift. Granted, that might be a colloquial usage versus technical definition difference, though.

        1. I’m hoping he means the airplane, as things associated with it are significantly less likely to get stuck in my head than things associated with the other two.

        2. Although, I was thinking Jefferson Airplane in a response to that TLO. B52s are intensely more better than whomever did that “Groove is in the heart” insanity. At least I could try to dance to B52s and not cause an earthquake.

          hey, hey, hey.

  13. Is the guy who wants the pink hoverboard the guy in the back of the poll that chose this storyline with a different haircut and facial hair? I can’t tell if they are or just two fat guys supposed to fill the same rough background character niche and similar for that reason.

    (found it at http://shotgunshuffle.com/?attachment_id=1453 for anyone else wanting to see if they think I’m blind or not).

      1. Correct, different haircut. They have the same bald spot, though. Granted, hair that long is a commitment and he seems unlikely to cut the pony tail, but it’s not impossible.

        1. Heh, his mom made him cut his pony tail off, clean up his room, take out the trash before he could go to the comic book convention to see his online girlfriend.

  14. The idea of a hoverboard being any color other than pink is completely preposterous. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to push my imaginary glasses up in a condescending manner.

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