If she’s killing people with mundane balloons I’d argue she’s incredibly lethal comsidering what she’s working with.
That aside the balloons could be inflated with a lighter than air cgemical or biological vector that is fatal if inhaled. Could be filled with a flammable gas for arson. The string could be disguised garrote. I’m sure there are more ways.
It might just be a signature, we should really look into the number of dead bodies found clutching a balloon with a woman’s phone number on it. Cops probably overlooked it, treat it as a coincidence, or assume it’s a jealous ex of the balloon girl….
Ah the ol’ poison gas in a balloon lol I rather like the flammable gas though. Then you can pop it with an on fire device to set it off.
Also, first comment AND Rusche commented? I think this calls for me to make a legit account.
On behalf of the first committee chair. This is officially the official first comment. Also, we have a lurking committee. However, they all seem to have latex and mylar allergies, so they can only attended when their are only lead balloons.
Yeah, that’s actually almostall of the boxes that I was thinking. I don’t know if I should be impressed that you think like me… or terrified.
All of those sound interesting.
I was thinking of something a little more surreal.
Such as IT disguising itself as a signature assassin, then using the opportunity to play with its food with balloons.
No bodies are found, of course. LOL
In his case, she fits the perfect mold, until he takes her out and turns into an evil clown with balloons bent on killing and eating him. That should scare him enough to be tasty.
Don\t forget, floating balloons require pressurized helium. And ANY kind of pressurized gas can be straight up terrifying.
So yeah… When I was like 4 or so, my sister was 8 and would pick on me all the time… To get revenge, I would ask my parents to get me a balloon… I loved balloons… but oh my, I was always loosing them… well because every time my sister pissed me off, I would steal something of hers she loved, tie it to the balloon, and let it float away… “Son? Do you know where your sisters thing is? No Dad, I literally don’t know where it is (anymore)….Heh
If there was an ounce of realism in this strip, I’d point out that it’s probably pretty difficult to get a gas significantly lighter than air that is particularly dangerous. Natural Gas, Methane, CH4, has a molar weight of 16. Nitrogen gas, N2, which makes up the vast majority of our atmosphere, has a molar weight of 28, so, yes, I think methane would be lighter than air, but not nearly as much lighter as is Helium, with its molar weight of 4, or Hydrogen, with its molar weight of 2.
Granted, both Methane and Hydrogen are highly flammable when burned in free oxygen at near room temperature.
But then, this is the comic strip with spherical cats, hovering cell phones, and eldritch horrors who are family men.
Potentially a finely grained powder that reacts with the atmosphere and helium or hydrogen to keep it floating (and that it presumably doesn’t react with) could be potentially workable, as long as the powder is fine enough to float easily and not too static-prone to stick to the balloon remnants.
Powdered metallic sodium could certainly be painful to have popped in your face in Florida humidity (especially if it wouldn’t react with hydrogen and you could use that as filler).
I read your comment in MacGyver’s voice.
I won’t complain about that.
On the other hand it made me start thinking about most amusing voices to read my comments in.
Best I have so far is The Count from Sesame Street (I was taking it assumed as being generally understandable, so the Swedish Chef was out before I started, though he is a favorite of mine for such things).
Actually, if you could get the chemicals for it, mustard gas would be a good option. It isn’t lighter than air but it doesn’t have to be. The balloon just needs to contain enough helium to lift the chemicals. A certain news story last year actually had me look this up. It’s usually stored in two or more chemicals that readily mix into mustard gas to make it both safer and increase it’s shelf life as contained mustard gas will only last a matter of weeks. And with an abundance of balloons in an enclosed space… a small amount is all you’d need. The bigger the space the more balloons filled with the chemicals but also the easier it is to justify having more balloons. Granted you wouldn’t want to be anywhere near these balloons when they popped as it is a blister agent… but if she dressed up in a clown costume that was in fact a hazmat suit and then donned a mask and hood… I’m thinking about this too much. MAKE IT STOP!
mR. Blue rolls 2D4 for action and 1D20 for initiative. My D20 shows 16. With 12 that would be 30. My 2D4 roll is eleven for effect.
I walk up to the plane seat in which Stephen is sitting in, shake him violently and slap him twice before walking away to tell someone to not call me Shirley.
As long as you don’t start stocking up on chemicals for the balloon or carrying around treatments with you all the time, you’re fine.
Checking every clown you see with balloons to make sure they aren’t a terrorist or mass murderer is just good sense.
It just has to displace the oxygen one breathes.
Or totally normal weapons, and a floatier than normal gas, so when they pop, people under them die.
…what would be more believable, and deadly, suspended knives, or land mines, what set of sexy assassins did she show up with?
Jebus Rice Merrick! Put down the montage and donyiur freaken job. That stuff is the reason you need sexy assassin’s, co-workers sisters and single moms to fill the joint up.
This strip kind of makes me wonder how montage use is perceived to others not involved in the montage. Do you go about your daily routine but only percieve/retain the highlights that make up the montage or do you veg out and only do those specific things? As far as memory/perception works the end user wouldn’t really be able to tell the difference but it would be funny to see someone quietly sitting in the corner listening to music suddenly jump up, do one specific thing, then return to doing nothing until the next musical cue comes up.
I’ve wondered that too. In comic The Favorite One (current post date September 10, 2014), Pumpkin describes Danny as weird smelling (maybe related to montage, maybe not) and Ellie says he zoned out on her while she was talking and kinda’ stared, but she didn’t seem to suspect montage (also a few months later in comic Contract Fulfillment, current post date June 23, 2015, Ellie doesn’t seem to have any suspicion that Danny would have drugs on him).
So Ellie couldn’t tell it apart from whatever she considered mild/acceptable level of perving on her by Danny, apparently.
I think that’s the only instance we have to examine for certain.
Well she was already dealing with him daydreaming about her in her underwear even before he purchased musical narcotics. Though it’s possible Danny’s normal behavior is just difficult to distinguish from his behavior under the influence.
My first thought was, “yep, helps pick them out in a crowd” and it took me a moment to realize that a girl without a face would stand out enormously more in a crowd.
Weird where first impression thoughts go and the things that fail to be obvious at first glance sometimes.
When my best friend and I had a long dry spell of dating, we joked about lowering our standards to the basics, “human, damage, alive… consciousness was negotiable.” ;)
It’s that so-familiar look of “This is impossible. How is this a thing that’s in reality? But here it is. It can’t be, but here it is. Am I hallucinating? Have the years of loneliness and rejection finally turned my frontal cortex into a shrieking goo that has produced this eldritch image of a perfect woman?”
I have to ask, was Jessica called in by Ginger, was grabbed off the street by one of the D52 and convinced to come in, appeared otherwise by coincidence, or was she a member and thus one of the actually incredibly rare girls from the site showed up?
I knew of two of the three, but not of the furst. The only thing I know of, I think, of P.A. extending off of the electronic page would be: “So you want to be a Web comic artist competition” and their attempt to have it be a competition like cupcake wars.
Cin: OMG, that blonde dude was so cool. Glad his phone number is on this super cool balloon.
Phone: hello, Jessica speaking.
You forgot,
Cin: my twin likes girls, so I must like girls.
Herb: good morning. I have an update on my daughters case. It seems we have a cereal assaulted on our hands. And according to survivor ststements, most of them are former shrimp boat captains and airline pilots.
Because have you ever tried to date a girl who didn’t have a face? Making out is almost impossible, and she’s a burden on the conversation if you ever go out for pasta.
I was saying “That is an awesome balloon.” Except I got stuck on the word “Awesome”, saying it over and over.. Awesome-O is my cat’s name, so he’s really confused now.
101 thoughts on “That Face You Make When She Checks All the Boxes”
I wonder how does one kill with a balloon?
She’s the least lethal member.
If she’s killing people with mundane balloons I’d argue she’s incredibly lethal comsidering what she’s working with.
That aside the balloons could be inflated with a lighter than air cgemical or biological vector that is fatal if inhaled. Could be filled with a flammable gas for arson. The string could be disguised garrote. I’m sure there are more ways.
“Warning: Choking hazard.”
I like the way you think.
It might just be a signature, we should really look into the number of dead bodies found clutching a balloon with a woman’s phone number on it. Cops probably overlooked it, treat it as a coincidence, or assume it’s a jealous ex of the balloon girl….
Ah the ol’ poison gas in a balloon lol I rather like the flammable gas though. Then you can pop it with an on fire device to set it off.
Also, first comment AND Rusche commented? I think this calls for me to make a legit account.
On behalf of the first committee chair. This is officially the official first comment. Also, we have a lurking committee. However, they all seem to have latex and mylar allergies, so they can only attended when their are only lead balloons.
Yeah, that’s actually almostall of the boxes that I was thinking. I don’t know if I should be impressed that you think like me… or terrified.
All of those sound interesting.
I was thinking of something a little more surreal.
Such as IT disguising itself as a signature assassin, then using the opportunity to play with its food with balloons.
No bodies are found, of course. LOL
In his case, she fits the perfect mold, until he takes her out and turns into an evil clown with balloons bent on killing and eating him. That should scare him enough to be tasty.
Don\t forget, floating balloons require pressurized helium. And ANY kind of pressurized gas can be straight up terrifying.
So yeah… When I was like 4 or so, my sister was 8 and would pick on me all the time… To get revenge, I would ask my parents to get me a balloon… I loved balloons… but oh my, I was always loosing them… well because every time my sister pissed me off, I would steal something of hers she loved, tie it to the balloon, and let it float away… “Son? Do you know where your sisters thing is? No Dad, I literally don’t know where it is (anymore)….Heh
So many possibilities…. I mean, think about it. If there were only one way, it wouldn’t be much of a “specialty”, would it?
They are filled with poisonist gas.
Further, that was a classic Joker Gas delivery method. The hint to this in the Harley Quinn balloon.
If there was an ounce of realism in this strip, I’d point out that it’s probably pretty difficult to get a gas significantly lighter than air that is particularly dangerous. Natural Gas, Methane, CH4, has a molar weight of 16. Nitrogen gas, N2, which makes up the vast majority of our atmosphere, has a molar weight of 28, so, yes, I think methane would be lighter than air, but not nearly as much lighter as is Helium, with its molar weight of 4, or Hydrogen, with its molar weight of 2.
Granted, both Methane and Hydrogen are highly flammable when burned in free oxygen at near room temperature.
But then, this is the comic strip with spherical cats, hovering cell phones, and eldritch horrors who are family men.
Potentially a finely grained powder that reacts with the atmosphere and helium or hydrogen to keep it floating (and that it presumably doesn’t react with) could be potentially workable, as long as the powder is fine enough to float easily and not too static-prone to stick to the balloon remnants.
Powdered metallic sodium could certainly be painful to have popped in your face in Florida humidity (especially if it wouldn’t react with hydrogen and you could use that as filler).
I read your comment in MacGyver’s voice.
I won’t complain about that.
On the other hand it made me start thinking about most amusing voices to read my comments in.
Best I have so far is The Count from Sesame Street (I was taking it assumed as being generally understandable, so the Swedish Chef was out before I started, though he is a favorite of mine for such things).
Actually, if you could get the chemicals for it, mustard gas would be a good option. It isn’t lighter than air but it doesn’t have to be. The balloon just needs to contain enough helium to lift the chemicals. A certain news story last year actually had me look this up. It’s usually stored in two or more chemicals that readily mix into mustard gas to make it both safer and increase it’s shelf life as contained mustard gas will only last a matter of weeks. And with an abundance of balloons in an enclosed space… a small amount is all you’d need. The bigger the space the more balloons filled with the chemicals but also the easier it is to justify having more balloons. Granted you wouldn’t want to be anywhere near these balloons when they popped as it is a blister agent… but if she dressed up in a clown costume that was in fact a hazmat suit and then donned a mask and hood… I’m thinking about this too much. MAKE IT STOP!
mR. Blue rolls 2D4 for action and 1D20 for initiative. My D20 shows 16. With 12 that would be 30. My 2D4 roll is eleven for effect.
I walk up to the plane seat in which Stephen is sitting in, shake him violently and slap him twice before walking away to tell someone to not call me Shirley.
As long as you don’t start stocking up on chemicals for the balloon or carrying around treatments with you all the time, you’re fine.
Checking every clown you see with balloons to make sure they aren’t a terrorist or mass murderer is just good sense.
It just has to displace the oxygen one breathes.
Or totally normal weapons, and a floatier than normal gas, so when they pop, people under them die.
…what would be more believable, and deadly, suspended knives, or land mines, what set of sexy assassins did she show up with?
So all the analyzing properties of the balloon…she could just strangle them with the string?
A dare, and a Lot of balloons tied to the target.
What’s the word? Hindenburg!
Oh the humanity!
caesar zeppeli fights with bubbles,
dont underestimate floaty round things
So does Sailor Mercury. And if that fails she can always beat you to death with her gd princess wand.
The phrases “Sailor Mercury” and “beat you to death” go together like plaids and polka dots.
* This woman’s words speak the truth.
(ignore my previous reply. I tried to include a picture but just found out that img tags aren’t allowed in the comments)
Imagine the following pic is attached instead of this sentence: https://ibin.co/3pavAxpudtuu.png
* This woman’s words speak the truth.
LOL. This must be how they met IRL.
Just realized how ridiculous the concept of a ballon dealer is. So many little touches make this strip great.
Jebus Rice Merrick! Put down the montage and donyiur freaken job. That stuff is the reason you need sexy assassin’s, co-workers sisters and single moms to fill the joint up.
Ah. But he IS doing his job. He deals not only in montage, but also in epiphanies. Real ones cost extra.
He’s right now montaging his way to payday again…actually, everyone might be better off that way.
This strip kind of makes me wonder how montage use is perceived to others not involved in the montage. Do you go about your daily routine but only percieve/retain the highlights that make up the montage or do you veg out and only do those specific things? As far as memory/perception works the end user wouldn’t really be able to tell the difference but it would be funny to see someone quietly sitting in the corner listening to music suddenly jump up, do one specific thing, then return to doing nothing until the next musical cue comes up.
I’ve wondered that too. In comic The Favorite One (current post date September 10, 2014), Pumpkin describes Danny as weird smelling (maybe related to montage, maybe not) and Ellie says he zoned out on her while she was talking and kinda’ stared, but she didn’t seem to suspect montage (also a few months later in comic Contract Fulfillment, current post date June 23, 2015, Ellie doesn’t seem to have any suspicion that Danny would have drugs on him).
So Ellie couldn’t tell it apart from whatever she considered mild/acceptable level of perving on her by Danny, apparently.
I think that’s the only instance we have to examine for certain.
Well she was already dealing with him daydreaming about her in her underwear even before he purchased musical narcotics. Though it’s possible Danny’s normal behavior is just difficult to distinguish from his behavior under the influence.
YES. HAS FACE! *fist pump*
Always preferred girls with faces myself.
My first thought was, “yep, helps pick them out in a crowd” and it took me a moment to realize that a girl without a face would stand out enormously more in a crowd.
Weird where first impression thoughts go and the things that fail to be obvious at first glance sometimes.
But, but, but, but, but, the Question, the Spoiler.
Alive, too! I hear dating dead girls is a real hassle. No drama, at least until the cops see you out with her.
When my best friend and I had a long dry spell of dating, we joked about lowering our standards to the basics, “human, damage, alive… consciousness was negotiable.” ;)
I don’t think anyone is quite surprised that “alive” is on the list. How low it seems to rank though may be cause for concern.
Is that Jess? Love the connection here.
And, love
Exiting and new
Come aboard
We’re expecting yew!
The LOVE Float!
The Love Float?
Maybe if they did the theme music with Whitesnake.
I see them huffing helium together.
This one’s for all the balloon haters.
Take that balloon haters! Yay!
Boy, you dodged a bullet. You almost got Cinnamon!
THIS IS THE BEST THING EVER. I GET TO HOLD BALLOONS AND GET JAMES?!?! The all caps is necessary.
HEY, DAGNABBIT.
You forgot the awesome hats.
The hat is a given.
Sadly the hat isn’t a given for all of us. Never take your hat for granted, never. :'(
Hopefully you last longer than Heather.
I totally called it! (see above) XD
Now I want a JEM balloon!
I Soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo want this to be real.
Why yes, Virginia, there IS a Santa Claus.
Oh wait, wrong teleplay.
Why yes, Mr. Blue, this is an actual ship.
No, I so want this to be how they met. Balloons, ballrooms and damn it. I can’t think of a third “B” to keep the alliteration going.
And booze. Never forget the booze.
boobs, booze, ballistics, bullets, bubblegum, badminton, batman, batgirl, brobdingnaggian, bravado, bravery, bombs, boulders, bandicoots…
James is now feeling he’s in unfamiliar territory: connection with a female that has the same interests.
Good for him.
Looks to me like anxiety, reality and chiropractor bills.
It’s that so-familiar look of “This is impossible. How is this a thing that’s in reality? But here it is. It can’t be, but here it is. Am I hallucinating? Have the years of loneliness and rejection finally turned my frontal cortex into a shrieking goo that has produced this eldritch image of a perfect woman?”
I have to ask, was Jessica called in by Ginger, was grabbed off the street by one of the D52 and convinced to come in, appeared otherwise by coincidence, or was she a member and thus one of the actually incredibly rare girls from the site showed up?
Literally all of the daaaaawww.
Waitaminnut…is that the PAX logo underneath the hastily-applied Lovecon sign?
What’s PAX?
Penny Arcade Expo?
…a video game expo sponsored by the webcomic Penny Arcade?
…quite possibly one of the most popular and longest-running webcomics online?
…that we beat rather handily in the March Madness competition of I think it was 2015?
Stop me when any of this sounds familiar.
I knew of two of the three, but not of the furst. The only thing I know of, I think, of P.A. extending off of the electronic page would be: “So you want to be a Web comic artist competition” and their attempt to have it be a competition like cupcake wars.
Cin: OMG, that blonde dude was so cool. Glad his phone number is on this super cool balloon.
Phone: hello, Jessica speaking.
You forgot,
Cin: my twin likes girls, so I must like girls.
Herb: good morning. I have an update on my daughters case. It seems we have a cereal assaulted on our hands. And according to survivor ststements, most of them are former shrimp boat captains and airline pilots.
Why is “has face” a box??
Humor.
Because have you ever tried to date a girl who didn’t have a face? Making out is almost impossible, and she’s a burden on the conversation if you ever go out for pasta.
You don’t know where to shove the ice cream cone…
There is NO convenient triangle. The fact that she looks like McRib is always back doesn’t help either.
THANK YOU.
Fair point.
Better a fair point than Gross Pointe Blank.
Because not everyone finds Renee Montoya attractive.
Because the Nurses from Silent Hill are not everyone’s cup of tea?
I kept dying in those games because I kept trying to make Harry, or James, or whoever make out with them. Apparently that’s wrong.
Love the Harley Quinn balloon.
And they say the perfect girl doesn’t exist.
And her name is Tarragon.
I was saying “That is an awesome balloon.” Except I got stuck on the word “Awesome”, saying it over and over.. Awesome-O is my cat’s name, so he’s really confused now.
Has face….guess being faceless is a negative.
You know, I saw you a couple years back at Mega con in Orlando, and I swear that assassin lady looks suspiciously like your wife.
lol. Not MY wife, but definitely someone’s wife. :)
I’m somebody’s what now?
Pst… Little hint… Look for the avatar above, with the hat.
can we backtrack to the dealer part for a sec
balloon dealers?! explain yourself!
what would you call a person that sells novelty items for a living?
I hope Jessica doesn’t find out about James’ absurdly low standards.
Love works in mysterious ways lol……this comic proves it